Time is Limited, So Don't Waste It

"Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life." Apple founder Steve Jobs.

 

How ironic, since Jobs died at 56 years old. His success was the stuff that Legends are made of. His public image was deliberately crafted to ensure the focus was on his company and not him. He changed the way we do things through his vision; and left a mark with Apple in Business, iTunes/Apple and the vast selection of MacBooks, and iPhone 12s.

 

Still, he had a reclusive spirit, and was secretive and eccentric. His family history revealed a man who lived a life of tangled relationships, was estranged from his birth parents and who himself fathered a love child whom he at first rejected.

 

He left behind a wife and their three children, whom he rarely spoke of in public. Even as he was suffering from cancer, he didn't soften his stance, especially about his birth father; he was quoted as saying, "this might sound strange, though, but I am not prepared, even if either of us was on our deathbeds, to pick up the phone to call him."

 

I guess you can say he lived HIS life. Work came first and he was well-paid for his efforts. Yet time ran out without mending some fences.

 

Jobs was a Buddhist; perhaps he had some sense of comfort in the belief that death simply leads to rebirth and that a person's spirit remains close by and seeks out a new body and new life. He may not have had a fear of dying.

 

I was raised to believe that every moment of life is precious and of infinite value. The most precious moments are those with loved ones, and helping others and that no act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted and as a Motherless Daughter and @nymomto3boys, I do think about life, death and legacy.

 

Perhaps that's why I chose a life advancing Nonprofit Organizations, one where I could help others. I believe my GIFT of time, talent and my compassion are more valuable that any donation of money. I am also certain that I never want to live a life like Steve Jobs did. I'm happy with mine.

 

The Starfish Story- You Can Make A Difference

Can you honestly say, "I made a difference to that one?"

The child who watched a parent endure substance abuse, domestic violence, and homelessness. Or was the victim of regular beatings himself. And stayed in touch, years after the child age-out of the system.

The teen who found solace in playing basketball in a youth center, or opted for a summer camp program, rather than participating in gang violence, crime, or illegal drugs.

The senior who struggled with vision loss and could no longer do the most basic independent living skills alone.

The peer of your child, who sat alone in a gymnasium because his parent could not attend his sporting event, so you went over and encouraged him, gave him water, PBJ, or a ride home. Maybe you volunteered at an animal shelter, collected money, food, and school supplies for those who couldn't afford them, or sent care packages to our deployed soldiers.

 None of these actions took away from my job, children, or my time. Yet each left an indelible mark on my heart and has motivated me to continue to pursue a career in social services. Despite my frustrations, I want to make a difference, even if it to just one starfish.

I know I can't do it alone, but as Mother Teresa once said, “together we can do great things.”

 

 

Happy International Women's Day Mom and Dad!

Today is International Women's Day, a global celebration of the social, economic, cultural, and political achievements of women. The day also marks a call to action for accelerating gender parity .

I was blessed to be raised by parents who were #woke, way before their time. My mom was an only child, so she did the typical post war activities a young girl did, but also spend a good amount of time rooting for the NY Giants Major League Baseball team with her dad. Other men took their sons to the Polo Grounds, but my Grandpa took his daughter!

My dad was a Depression-era baby. Shuffled from home to home, as his chronically ill mother ailed, and his father struggled to make ends meet. This instilled a keen sense of family, and while we were growing up, he was much more hands-on that other fathers. Being a victim of #antisemitism , had also extraordinarily strong feelings about #civilrights, and provided many opportunities for African American men to work in his business.

I grew up in the era of the Vietnam war and was encouraged to express my views. I wore a POW bracelet, wrote letters to congressman and was a news junkie. Early on, I recognized my desire to write and specifically about sports. Not the typical career goals of a woman of those times.

It was my dad who took me to college as freshman. As we drove up to the dorm to unpack, he said these very progressive words, "if you are here for your Mrs. Degree, leave now. I expect you to be able to have the tools to support yourself!" 

In the two years at Emerson College, I became the first female sports director for WECB Emerson College Broadcasting and wrote for the newspaper. I hung with the sports guys and the ladies who sat on the "wall" outside of 132 Beacon.

But one of my professors had other ideas and suggested I transfer to a more competitive institution, with Division 1 sports. I applied to a NY Ivy League School and several topflight schools in NJ, and eventually got the acceptance I wanted- Rutgers University.

Again, I pioneered, working shifts on the radio station (WRSU-FM Rutgers Radio), writing for the newspaper, and eventually getting a paid gig with a local Gannett | USA TODAY NETWORK newspaper. (The first female sportswriter there as well.) I also worked as an RA and made Dean's List. I was super-motivated to make my parents proud.

Upon graduation, I landed a role as a print journalist for the local newspaper (now lohud), again in sports, and again the first of my gender. Mind you, in was never aware at the time that this was an achievement, as my parents led me to believe I could do the same job as any man!

After five years, and the death of my mother, I had my first awakening to the gender divide. How could I combine my desire to be a mother with a profession that required such difficult hours? I decided to use my talents in a more family-friendly sector; so, I thought. I would use my writing skills to improve my community.

Early in my career, I saw the bias against women; lower wages and assumptions which were wrong. I even left a job when my newborn child was sick, and the "family-friendly" agency expected me to leave him home and come to work.

But I heard the message of my dad loud and clear; make sure you could support yourself. I developed a voice, not always confident, which said, "I will give you 120%, but if my kid gets sick, I am out of here and the rules don't change!" I went on to have three fabulous boys and replace the need to be home when they were sick with the need to rearrange hours for baseball, football, and of course, Wrestling.

I also became the more consistent provider for my family and while my kids are now grown, one in college and two at beginnings of their own careers, I am still juggling the needs of family and finance and have once again had to defend my needs vs. money-saving attempts by employers.

When I ascended to a leadership role, I allowed my staff to be with children for illness, sports, and school conferences, as well as tending to the needs of elderly parents or chronically ill spouses.

Today, I thank my parents for being the real visionaries. They raised their children to be blind to precepts that the rest of society were not. I proudly did the same with my children. So, Happy International Women's Day 2022 to the ladies who have achieved in areas of academics, Vocation, Athletics, and Family; and congratulations to the fellow women and men who have encouraged and supported them.

 

 

 

Today's Horoscope?

I'm not really sure why, but I begin my morning routine, by checking my horoscope and then I quickly forget what it says. I know they are one-size-fits-all and purely for entertainment purposes, but I do. I also read the folded papers in my fortune cookies.
 
There have been times where the daily message will match the occurrences of the day. Coincidence obviously.
 
I am an Aquarian. "Aquarius is the sign different from the rest of the zodiac and people born with their Sun in it feel special. This makes them eccentric and energetic in their fight for freedom, or at times shy and quiet, afraid to express their true personality. In both cases they are deep thinkers and highly intellectual people who love to fight for idealistic causes. They are able to see people without prejudice and this makes them truly special. Although they can easily adapt to the energy that surrounds them, Aquarius representatives have a deep need to have some time alone and away from everything in order to restore power."
 
As a non-profit executive, this makes sense. Many historical and pop culture celebrities have also been born under the sign: Jackie Robinson, Abraham Lincoln, Rosa Parks, and Ronald Reagan. Also Carole King, Neil Diamond, and Oprah Winfrey. However, so are my son and sister and while there are similarities between us, there are more differences.
 
So what is in store today? According to Yahoo, "you've slowed down, but you're still ready for some serious learning. Your big brain is always hungry for new information, and you should find that things start to get interesting soon."
 
The Newyork Post says: "You appear to be in one of your all-or-nothing moods at the moment and while it’s unlikely to do any harm today it could create problems for you later in the week. Try to be a bit more flexible. Bend a little so no one can break you."

The New York Daily News advises:

"be creative to stay ahead of competitors - or even an ambitious co-worker. No one has more new and inspiring ideas than you, Aquarius, so use your innate skill now, when it's needed the most. If you're #strategic and approach the right people, it will present you as an expert in your field. You have an abundance of experience to draw from. So much so that you probably have forgotten more than most people have learned."

So, as this week begins, I will continue to learn, make adjustments, and remain creative. I'll secretly make a wish that the #decision-makers will notice these attributes and make my Dreams (and previous horoscopes) come true!

And go Rutgers University. Proud of my #ScarletKnights

Hire a Human, Not a Robot

I saw this picture on Facebook last night. Redcrab opened a new restaurant in our local mall.
 
The reviews were great, and I love fresh Seafood, so eventually I will pay the spot a visit. But I was saddened by this picture.
 
Evidently, the Franchise promotes fresh and customized seafood; we all agree it is very courageous for any business person to invest their life-savings to open a new #venture during these unsettling times. On the positive note, new businesses bring new jobs. They promote local #tourism and move the economy in a positive way.
 
So, why am I sad? Look closely and you will see that the restaurant is using a mechanical waiter to deliver food to the #customers. It’s a GIMMICK, but that's also one less job available to an out-of-work person. We've already replaced too many #entryleveljobs with #cashless check-out, #self-service lines, Amazon, eBay and automated receptionists.
 
Some will respond that no one wants to work; one of the first questions I hear in my job search is "are you willing to come to an office?" However, this trend existed before COVID-19 and now the public and economy are suffering. Longer lines at stores, post offices, Banks, and fast-food chains.
 
The restaurant industry has been one of the hardest hit during the pandemic. Costs for food and gas have made it difficult for #smallbusinessowner to turn a #profit. Some tried to salvage their declining indoor dining, by using delivery services such as Grubhub and DoorDash. Others have amped up their #specialevents. Boozy Brunches, #trivia nights, Karaoke, and music provided by cover bands or DJs are no longer reserved for Saturday evenings at the bar.
 
This should necessitate the need for cooks, greeters, bartenders, bus and waitstaff. My college-aged son has worked in the restaurant INDUSTRY since he was a junior in high school.
 
During the pandemic, he worked long hours at a local family-owned establishment. He answered phones, mopped floors, bused tables, delivered outbound orders, helped with food prep, and eventually became a waiter. After the previous manager quit, he took on that role until he went back to school in August.

When he learned that his boss was contemplating closing for three days to host a family wedding, because of lack of staff, he came home from college and worked three 12-hour days, to keep things afloat for the owners. He answered phones, waited tables, and went to the bank to deposit the day's proceeds. 

A robot can't do that.